Don’t ever let a man make you feel guilty for something he has done. For if he calls your character into question full well knowing he has taken the same action in the same situation, it says way more about his character than yours.
The one who points the finger is often the weaker of the two. The need to make a point and reacting even at all, is a childish action that shows such a deep-rooted fear. Those who blame and can’t just accept a situation for what it is (or what they interpret it to be) are the ones we should be happy from escaping from. If someone cuts you off, puts you down, or sends you some type of aggressive stab-of-a-message over Facebook private message or email, identify their obvious need for a sense of control on a situation. Your best bet is not trying to explain yourself, not showing them just how presumptuous they are and not advertising to them all the times they have done the same thing, which you never reacted to. Why not? Because as offended, hurt and worked up as you might be, it will likely fall upon deaf ears. This person has made up their mind, oblivious to their role in your actions they are criticizing.
Sometimes people need an excuse or a reason to write someone off. They look for ways to justify to themselves that they are in the right for cutting you from their lives, so they go on a hunt to try to validate themselves. But by doing so, they often miss the other side of the story. Your sincerity, your consideration, your grace. For you would never point fingers at them (as much as you might want to.) The high road is the only road us blonde, bronzed, twentysomethings will take. He fails to look at the reality: the times where he has done the exact same thing, if not worse. The wrongs he’s done, not taking you into consideration. And so, the culprit of this aggression will hopefully sooner or later, realize how quick they were to judge, and by then it will be too late. Their character is the one in question, not yours.
Don’t let others words or perception of you jolt your world. You can only control yourself. Bad and good will happen to us all, but the only thing we have control over is how we react. Make the right choice, lovely lady. After all, do you really want someone in your life who is willing to make judgments, not hear your side of the story, and not take ownership for doing the exact same to which they blame you about? Them cutting you off is a gift. You should thank them.
- Jenny Jen
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