The ball can be in your court, always. You just need to be that independant hot little mama that you are deep down and not put yourself in situations where you have no control. If you can take care of yourself financially, you need not others to take care of you in that way. If you always bring your car or cab moeny with you, you can make a clean, swift exit without depending on another.
When people do things for us, we often are made to feel like we owe them in some way. If you are one who is nodding in agreement while reading this, then you are my target market, my demographic if you will, for this blog post.
The thing is, when we are placed in a situation where others have the upper hand, it is typically our own wrong doing. It is likely, that we let them. I hear of marriages where the husband and wife sleep in separate rooms, only together still because financially she can’t afford to leave. I’ve heard of couples stuck on vacations together when they feel lonelier than ever, because they have to wait until the flight back home, stranded within their own misfortune.
Realize how you can take control on your surroundings and then follow that through. Know your plan come end of eve before drinks are a pourin’ so you don’t need to call that guy you kind of enjoy seeing but more so out of convenience than anything. So you don’t depend on a friend who will likely be annoyed at a last minute request. Don’t accept a date with someone out of courtesy if you know you don’t see it going anywhere. Don’t tell someone you will call them or call them just because and get locked in a conversation, just because you feel bad.
When you stop casting yourself in the role of the victim, you can stop playing it. And that freedom is a weight off your shoulders that you didn’t even know you had on ’em in the first place baby girl.
– Jenny Jen
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