How to seal the deal (by using technology) 101

You’re here; he’s there.

You hear that tell tale sign coming from your smartphone and it’s just what you were hoping for.  He initiated a text/DM/private message and it is in that very moment that you’re all too reassured that you shouldn’t have switched over to the dark side, as they say.  Because to get a text or response from a crush, is to have a butterfly induced stomach; one of the best feelings in the world.  And so – though you’re in the middle of working or doing that in which you are –  you immediately write back a witty, cutesy, attempt-to-win-him-over kind of message. This, my speedy-typer you, is flirting at it’s finest.  He’s at a distance so can’t see you blushing madly. He can’t feel your passionate (and perhaps over-excited energy.)  He can however read your words in a timely fashion, maintaining convo throughout the day all in the setting of a business meeting he’s sitting in.  How sneaky; how racy.  How addicting.

I’ve always loved the way we can get to know someone over text/private messaging.  We can see their display images and of course, judge them for how they are choosing to rep themselves.  We can get to know how they write, spell, communicate.  We get to borderline spend their day with them, even though we might be worlds apart.  As you’re getting to know someone, I truly think that this is the best mode of communication.  You more old-school types are likely shaking your heads at the computer, at me, but we are in the now.  We are busy, successful, on-the-go women, and this is a way to reach out without interrupting your own day.  Sitting at a dinner table on an evening out with the girls?  You can write him without others eavesdropping.  See something oh-so-cute that you can’t put into words, you can shoot him an image of it easily through your phone, without it costing you a thing (financially and time wise.)

I had the opportunity to speak on a panel called “Love in the Digital Age,” for Social Media Week in Toronto back in February.  In case you missed the live stream or weren’t in attendance, I spoke about the importance of building a connection with someone over this forum. By messaging them each day and communicating to get to know each other; to strengthen a bond. So if you’re sitting around wondering why things are going so slow with you two and why he hasn’t asked you out yet, shoot him a message and set the wheels in motion.  Create a daily dialect so he associates you as part of his daily life.  Plus hopefully, he’ll have the courage to ask you out in this ‘less pressure’ kind of forum.  You dig?

– Jenny Jen


One thought on “How to seal the deal (by using technology) 101

  1. I know I’m a little older but you make it sound like dating messaging has only just been invented 🙂 The thrill of getting a message on old skool cell phones and email was also a buzz, just less pictoral. Remember pre 2000 if you had a mobile and you got a message beep in a meeting it meant business to your boss so you could reply at will so long as you could keep the smile off your face. Instead you had to go for the serious ‘This message is so important or the company could lose a big contract’ frown whilst instead your stomach was doing cartwheels.

    Will have to check out the stream as it’s interesting to see the change in the medium of flirting. I’ll tweet this out.


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