You have an idea in your head. Wait scratch that, not an idea, but a plan. Oh yes, you my little lovely reader are on a mission. Whether it’s a plot to land that guy you’ve been crushing on for really since ever, or if it’s a plan on how to get your butt into gear, you can only see it through once you’ve gone through the motions in your head of actually doing it. For, we can’t take action unless we have a game plan.
A friend of mine (who is more like a brother to me) has been one of my go-to’s for advice ever since I remember. And yes, even I need some sometimes. One thing this friend has always said is we do things and live things before they happen. Our minds therefore always a step ahead of our actions. So when a guy pursues you, it is likely that he’s been wondering for a while what it would be like to date you and consequentially have you as his girlfriend. By the time you actually let him win his prize, so to say, it’s as if he’s already been dating you all that time the idea of you was in his head. He has played out the sleepovers, the dinner dates, the giving you the toothbrush visions, which is why they seem to happen so organically. Therefore it should be noted, there is always one person in relationships who is a step ahead. This happens before an engagement, or a breakup as well. In fact the same guy friend just got engaged and as I gave him my whole-hearted congrats, asking him all the typical ‘so how did you do it?’ and ‘how do you feel’ questions, he responded by telling me he feels like he’s been engaged for months, because he knew he would be doing it.
Spontaneous though we might think we are, the game changing decisions we make are ones which come with much thought, intention and plan. So if you can envision it, whatever the it might be, chances are you can make it happen. Talk whatever it is through with a friend. Have an outsider affirm whether what you want is obtainable, and have them give their insight on the situation overall. Be realistic with your plan, and once you are, go through the motions of seeing it through (so long as it is something that will better you in some way). The process of growing is all about taking care of yourself. Do it with class, do it with grace and do it with an acceptance that whatever will be will be. Though you can only control yourself and your side of things, if you make your mission known, others become able to take their step.
– Jenny Jen
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