The future. Do you and your man have one together? Have you discussed it? Does he make comments as he we’s this and we’s that about trips, living arrangements, future events, etc? As a yogi I always focus on the importance of staying in the present. Not worrying about what’s next. Just being, and taking things as they are in that exact moment. However, as a relationship expert I know all too well how often women avoid the tell-tale signs that their other half isn’t interested in being part of a whole anytime soon. If you can see a future with the one you’re with, before you start making plans for the two of you in your head, check in with him. ‘But I’ll freak him out if I ask,’ you think to yourself as you read this. Then freak him out. If he is a keeper he’ll recognize that it’s a reasonable query.
Self help books and the ominous ‘rules of dating’ say you shouldn’t bring up ‘the future’ talk with your man because you’ll scare him away. Clingy. Needy. Aggressive. These are words that are often used to describe girls who go (a rumored too far) with making mention of what comes next. And though I say enjoy the dating process and let things happen naturally, it is important to check in with your lad and ensure that you are both on the same page.
The importance here is to prevent yourself from falling prey to what many women do: waiting. If you are silently waiting around, practicing patience, hoping a light will just one day go off in his head and he too will feel the same, you put yourself in a tricky position. Something won’t suddenly change. I’m sure you share much of your lives together and he likely knows what a catch he has, but when things stay status quo, no awareness is built. Build awareness by discussing your future and seeing what – if anything – holds him back and what you (and him) can both do to make things work so you’re both fulfilled. Relationships are about growth; both self-growth and growth in your partnership. A discussion like this will help you both target your wants and needs and can help you both reach your goals of being better partners for one another.
– Jenny Jen
Photo Credit: Source.