This past week I’ve come out of my cafe corner cave, from behind the computer screen to do something most of you know as ‘living’. After spending most days and nights writing my relationship column, blog and various articles (with stretching stints at the yoga studio), it seems as though I haven’t made the time to live that lifestyle which acted as ambition for me to start this blog in the first place. And with making public appearances (as I like to call them), comes an influx of many fellow twentysomethings (and fortysomethings alike) approaching me about their relationship woos, so they can grasp my opinion and some advice in hopes that they can grasp an understanding while they’re at it.
I love how candid people are with me and I love that I can be as candid with them in person (as I am when hiding behind my blog). And a theme that has been ever-so-common/can’t-be-ignored is the fact that we all seem to be turned on by the idea of ‘wrong’. Think: hooking up with the guy who sits two desks away from you at the office, the guy who is married, the guy who is buddies with your ex and the guy who lives on the same floor as you (need I continue?) I wrote an article on The Off Limits Guy a month or so ago for Women’s Post, but I didn’t take the opportunity to investigate why this sort of thing gets many of us off.
Why Doing Bad Feels So Good
1) It’s Taboo: Though other people may be doing it, no one really talks about it. Knowing that you’re doing something wrong is rather exciting. At this age, there aren’t many things that are classified as taboo anymore, so when we come cross across a ‘rule’ it’s only natural to want to break it and draw outside the lines especially when we know we shouldn’t.
2) The Line of Fire: It’s one thing if you want to take a risk and subdue your morals for but a moment, but it’s an added bonus to know you’ve come across a culprit who is capable (and wanting) to do the same. As if the risk is worth living out that fantasy. There’s something carnal about acting on instinct, isn’t there you little animal you?
3) Spontaneity: In a situation where you should be worrying the most, you are worrying the least. Wanting it right here right now, satisfying your unwarranted desires and not worrying about the aftermath adds some ease when usually your pretty little head is ridden with so many ‘what ifs’ and ‘should I, shouldn’t I’s’.
Though we claim that we need to be physically attracted to someone, this goes to show us that the idea of someone, the mental attraction, the allure of the bad, the forbidden fruit, is often enough for us to take a big, juicy bite.
– Jenny Jen
Photo Credit: BANEFUL & BEAUTIFUL.