‘Yay!’ you cheer in sheer bliss as you see an incoming message from the guy you’ve got the hots for. This message becomes a point of pride as you boast to your besties, saying ‘I knew he’d message me!’
Well that’s all well in good girly, but you were ringing a different tune just moments before as you self-protected yourself like none other, ‘You know what, if I don’t hear from him f*^$ him. I’m not that into him anyways.’ Your friends know this, a deep part within you knows this, but you put on that smile convincing yourself you’ve been proven wrong. Because he is in fact messaging you. He does in fact want to see you and therefore, yes he does in fact want you. Oh to be a twentysomething who is wanted and admired. Nothing does us any better in the world of dating and not-dating, and being lonely, and wanting, and being wanted in return. For the most part I suppose, but one big piece of the story which you are so certainly editing out you little Anna WIntour you, is the fact that this message has come in after midnight.
Even in fairy tales (think Cinderella) what happens once the clock strikes twelve isn’t pretty. Such is the same in real life honey, hate to be the bearer of bad, honest, couldn’t-be-more-true news. Where was he before midnight? During the day? Last week when he could’ve booked in your wonderful self in advance?
If a guy is genuinely interested in dating and/or being with you, he’ll want to book you in. He wants to know way before midnight rolls around that he will be seeing your hot ass before nights end. He isn’t afraid to commit to plans with you because when he’s interested in you, he’s not concerned something better may come up. He knows there isn’t anything better. Hell, he’d even switch his plans around to see you if he was so head-over-loafers (because we all know what we do when a guy we know has availability for us in his sched!)
So yes, I understand he is messaging you. And I’m not saying you shouldn’t feel wonderful because yes, a message to you means your on his mind, but honey, not for the right reasons. Zip up your pants, and your mouth. Don’t respond. Go tuck yourself into your plush white bed with a big bottle of water. If dude really wants a piece (or even more), he won’t give up that easy. And if you want to add a little assertion for good measure, shoot him back a message saying he can write you in the morning or another day to plan a future get-together at a normal hour. Consider your message back your glass slipper.
– Jenny Jen
Stay tuned tomorrow for more on why us women write back to these late night messages, and what the guy is really thinking when he sends them.
Photo Credit: BANEFUL & BEAUTIFUL