Penalty: Two Minutes for Hooking

“Penalty: Two minutes for hooking,” the imaginary ref in my head shouts out. Which caught me off guard, because I was certain he’d call “Two minutes for unsportsmanlike conduct.” I shake my head, as one isn’t better than the other. Now my puck bunny readers are well aware of these penalties in the game of hockey. But for those of you who aren’t so familiar, here’s a brief description I took off a Hockey 101 website, and how it relates to your love life (or lack thereof).

Hockey has a variety of different offenses that can be committed by players or even coaches. These can play a major role in the how games are played as penalties result in a team having to play shorthanded giving the other team a significant advantage in manpower on the ice and usually an excellent opportunity to score goals.

“Hooking” is when someone puts a stick around an opponent to try to block his progress. Official Signal: A tugging motion with both arms, as if pulling something toward the stomach. Doesn’t sound or look pleasant, does it girls?


So how does this penalty relate to us blonde, bronzed, twentysomethings you wonder as you glance across the screen in hopes of finding some type of general relationship advice that you can relate to your own life. Well my ladies, this ‘hooking’ is just what happens to us when we are living it up, weight off our shoulders post relationship and seemingly out of nowhere, the x-factor comes along and tries to hook us. Mind the pun. Perhaps we trip on our skates. Perhaps we hit the harsh, cold ice. Now I don’t know about you, but as great as a skater as I am, I still manage to trip over a subtle hook. So how in the world do I get off the ice? I thought I was already long gone from the arena!

Am I alone out here with picking up on this? Where is the ref to call the penalty?

I think about Carrie and Big in Sex and the City. After each breakup, when Carrie has moved forward and is the best her she can be, it seems as if some sign, some calling, goes out to Big, as if he’s suddenly alerted of her fabulousness. It’s the same with us blonde beauties. I’ll tell you something, it’s called a breakup because it’s broken. Though a stick may come your way, continue avoiding it at all costs. Chances are you’ve already retired your jersey, changed your number and have been traded to a new team.

GAME OVER!

– Jenny Jen

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