Are you lounging around your apartment, reading Blonde, Bronzed, Twentysomething, dressed in nothing but his t-shirt? His t-shirt being that super comfy, warn in, oversized t-shirt you “borrowed” from a certain someone once upon a time? Whether he be the current guy in your life, or perhaps even your ex, do you come home after work and change out of your power suit, turning it in for this beloved tee? Well my fashion-faux-pas-pals, you’re not alone.
I was choosing a pyjama shirt to wear to bed last night, when I threw on one the smelt of nostalgia and remnants of him. Now I chose it because I wanted something baggy and loose (a day by the pool gone wrong) and it wasn’t until I was chatting with one of my besties via Skype, that I realized that I was wearing his shirt. I don’t know what was worse: being busted wearing it after swearing i’m over it, or my friend knowing it was his shirt because she’s seen him wearing it in his Facebook pictures? In any case, I dodged the analysis by generalizing this phenomena of women everywhere who hang onto a guys t-shirt.
Now I blogged last winter about ‘The Who’s Who of Sweatpants’ http://www.blondebronzedtwentysomething.com/2009/11/whose-who-of-sweatpants.html – this idea that every girl has at least one pair of random grey sweats in her wardrobe which she got from a guy on the way out of his place to try to hide the very obvious walk of shame (because let’s face it, at 5am, when hopping into a cab in a pair of grey sweats and 4 inch Manolo’s, we all know what you were really up to.) But the t-shirt situation is different.
The t-shirt is a level way above that of the sweat pants. A comfort comes with the knowingness that he wants you to have a shirt of his. So if you’ve snagged one before, congrats chickita! You definitely made it to the good books.
Here is the difference with scoring his t-shirt:
1) It’s likely one of his favourite shirts: The guy that gives you one of his t-shirts is more serious than the guy that gives you a ratty pair of sweats. The t-shirt is comparable to him making his mark and setting his territory. Guys have said it time and time again, they love seeing their current companion strutting around in nothing but their favourite, casual tee. It makes them feel good that you want to be in something of his, and let’s admit it, it looks much better on you than it does him.
2) You had to work for it: The girls who get the grey sweat pants are almost given them to move forward the ‘time-to-go-home’ process. The only work they had to do for the sweatpants was hook up then whine. The girl who gets the t-shirt on the other hand has to work on it. She has to put in time into the relationship and build trust: a) trust so he know’s eventually he’ll get it back or, b) trust because you opened your heart to him as he to you, that he’d even let you keep his prized possesion as a custody offering and memory of him if you two were ever to break up (the horror!)
3) It’s sentimental: The t-shirt is something that reminds you of him and the time you share/shared together. A representation of when you were a we. Even if you guy’s have separated ways, when you see his t-shirt sitting in your closet, it acts as a trigger bringing up – for a brief moment – thoughts of what you shared. Awww. I have a t-shirt from a guy who I dated for a few months in University. Whenever I put it on, I am taken into a video montage reel in my head of a few memories of him and I. No cheesy longing or anything, just a nice, sentimental kinda moment.
Do you have a collection of his t-shirts in your closet? Do you still wear it or have you hid them away in a box somewhere, along with your optimism?
Either way, while you have custody of his tee, he’s somewhere wishing if only he had his favourite concert shirt/white v-neck/graphic tee back. In his eyes perhaps, it’s like the one that got away.
– Jenny Jen