Women across the nation sat eagerly in front of their flat screens last night, waiting to see who Bachelor Jake Pavelka would choose to give his final rose to. The two women left in ‘The most dramatic Bachelor season yet’ couldn’t be more opposite. The first, Tenley is a ‘good on paper’ girl. She looks perfect, acts perfect and seems like the safe choice. The other, Vienna is a controversial character who speaks her mind and never misses an opportunity to let loose and have fun. She seems more like a gamble, and the negative, tabloid coverage doesn’t help. Jake ended up taking said gamble, which seemed to be the result of chemistry. Gotta love that love buzz.
So as the rest of the country logs onto online forums, and sits around talking about what an idiot Jake is for not picking the perfect catch, I sit here and nod my head in agreement with his decision.
Love Buzz – that undeniable chemistry you share with someone, that is almost electric. You don’t choose to have a love buzz with a certain person; it’s either there, or it’s not. To put love buzz and chemistry into words is almost impossible, since it is a physical feeling. It’s no wonder then, that – when faced with Tenley on the ‘After the Final Rose Ceremony’ special – Jake couldn’t answer her closure-thriving questions as to why she wasn’t the one.
Have you ever dated a guy that was great on paper, that you wanted – more than ever – to feel a connection with, but despite how much you were attracted to him, respected him and admired him, there was still ‘something missing?’ If so, you know how tough those situations are. Your friends and family are pressuring you to try to ‘make it work,’ yet you just know that as much as you want it to be the case, it just isn’t. You go through the guilty thoughts (why am I letting so-and-so go when they haven’t done a thing wrong and I’d be lucky to be with them) and then go through the guilty feelings when you’ve done so (am I making a mistake?)
You then meet someone else who you click with, and you no longer question your previous decisions. Perhaps the gamble (as I like to call it) is what creates this love buzz in the first place.
Have you ever dated someone who you had that something special with? That no one understood why you’re ‘settling’ but to you, you’re head over heels, high on the love buzz that you share? The love buzz is nothing anyone else but yourself can detect and when you feel it, you radiate on it and thrive off of it.
So yes, you may meet a doctor who makes you laugh and has the most perfect style (and wardrobe) but if he doesn’t have that je ne sais quoi, then I suggest you go with your gut. Life is all about drawing outside of the lines. And Jake must feel the same way. He must so-very-badly have wanted to make himself like Tenley, but at the end of the day, his gut and heart knew that Vienna is the one he feels connected to. So, the lesson of this seasons bachelor is to embrace the chemistry that is rare to find and don’t let it go, even if everyone is rooting for you to.