The Toothbrush Zone

Congratulations. You’ve entered the toothbrush zone. It’s that moment in your relationship (or fakelationship) where the guy you are seeing offers you a toothbrush from his standby collection, one in which you can keep at his place, a sure sign that he wants you back. Aside from the reassurance this offer gives, it also provides you with his clear unspoken thoughts on where you stand. It indicates he expects you to return, that he wants you to return, and that you will be returning more than once.

Let me toss some questions at you, my blonde hygienic friend:

– Do you have a toothbrush at a special someones place?
– How many toothbrushes do you have in and around the city?
– Do you have someone else’s toothbrush at your place?
– Have you ended it with a gentleman, only to return to his place on a hot-and-heavy night out a number of months later, only to find your toothbrush waiting out for you on his bathroom counter?

We all remember the epic episode when Big offered Carrie her very own pink toothbrush head for his electric toothbrush, a special ‘for her’ one. How cute is that? I actually ‘awww-ed’ out loud. Carrie says, “There’s only one pink brush head and Big was giving his to me. It was the most encouraging moment so far in our relationship.”

I remember once being on the phone with my then boyfriend. It was a few weeks into our relationship, and he called me from the pharmacy to confirm that I use the ‘Brilliant Blondes Moisturizing Conditioner.’ He then proceeded to tell me that he was on a for Jenny Jen shopping spree for the essentials I use that will make me feel more comfortable in his house. Mi casa, su casa. It was heavenly heartwarming and he continued to update my toothbrushes throughout the relationship. The pink rimmed toothbrush head for the electric was my fave. I’ve entered The Toothbrush Zone with a few others in the past. I wonder what those once key players in my life have done with the aftermath? Is it sitting in one of their cupboards, or did it leave the same day I walked out the door?

It’s nice to look back and remember what I felt when I was presented with the toothbrush. It’s as if the offering of it offered a whole new level to our relationship. I remember asking a guy if he gives toothbrushes to all the girls. He filled me in, saying he would never give a toothbrush to a just any girl, because it would make her think she’s always welcome. The toothbrush can invite stage five clingers, so if you are thinking of grabbing an extra one on your next pharmacy run, be sure you’re handing it out to a deserving partner. No time for mixed messages these days. Blackberry has taken over that for us.

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2 thoughts on “The Toothbrush Zone

  1. did you ever think the toothbrush wasnt so much as a sign of your blooming relationship but more " your breath really stinks in the morning" and you need to brush your teeth?BAHAHAHAHHAHA

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