The grass is always greener, so the story goes. Except however, when it’s not.
To be at a place where nothing holds you back or brings you down. To be at a place where you can make decisions for yourself by yourself. To be at a place where you can leave your phone unattended and on silent if you will, with no need to check it or check in, to wait or to need. To be at a place where you catch yourself smiling because of something you yourself accomplished, not a smile that came from anothers actions. To be.
When we’re dealing with issues in relationships, we sometimes wonder what it would be like to be single yet again, longing for the days when disappointment and misunderstandings had no effect on us. When single and possibly feeling lonely, we often long to be in a relationship and to find “the one.” They say people want what they don’t have and the grass is greener effect is indication of just that.
But it is when we are in a good, healthy place, when we attract both a mate and a relationship that will serve us well. What better time of year to put your best foot forward than the holiday season, as we approach a new year? So as you nod your head in agreement as your blonde lockes shake over your shoulder, I want you to use that mentality to shake everything else off your shoulders as well. This my little ladies is the very first step to becoming the best you you can be.
Let go of whatever it is you’re holding onto. A past partner, heartbreak, confusion, misunderstandings, tension with friends or family, disappointment. Let it all go. Acceptance and forgiveness are the greatest gifts you can give yourself. We can’t change our past but we can take control of our present. Do what excites and inspires you. Breath in your passion. Don’t say yes when you mean no. Don’t defend, nor justify. You avoid drama by keeping true to your word, not making assumptions, doing your best and not taking things personally, as expressed in The Four Agreements. So do just that. You will notice that when you are your best self, that you will attract a like minded mate when you least expect it.
The grass is greenest when you yourself are fully, completely, purely satisfied with your own life and have no need for anything or anyone else. They instead become but a bonus, yet someone else who you can share your triumphs and positive energy with. When there might be some challenges, some bad, some amazing and some over-the-top things that happen, but you’re able to maintain a stability throughout them all, as you navigate through what comes in a level-headed fashion. Therefore it seems that it isn’t so much as how green the grass actually is, but your ability to water the grass no matter what. I always thought that it was really rather serendipitous that all of my serious relationships started on Christmas. How the stars must have aligned for me to be found by others on this specific date, and end up experiencing such powerful, loving relationships. I now know that it is a little more than just fate, as I once thought or just a lucky day. Instead it is my state of mind at this time of year; the reflection and in turn acknowledgement of my years’ accomplishments, and ok fine…a little thing I call luck (though it may just be my holiday glow!)
- Jenny Jen
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